How Bartending Prepared Me For Motherhood

A few years ago, I was stretched out on a lawn chair next to my sister’s pool when she plopped down next to me, yelled at her kids to stop getting water everywhere, and casually asked, “So are you guys going to have kids?” Already in my mid-thirties, I’d learned that this question was the…

What Is Stalking, Though?

Quick question, is it technically stalking if you have no actual interest in someone? Asking for me, honestly, because yesterday I went for a nice walk and then somehow ended up knowing all of the things about some guy I’ve never seen or met and don’t really want to because from what the internet tells…

Figuring it Out Post-Breakdown, Post-Therapy, Postpartum

I was listening to Armchair Expert the other morning while getting ready and at one point had to put down my mascara to replay a section nine-thousand times because I don’t think I’ve ever felt so seen. The episode covered racism, internalized misogyny, fear, politics, self-awareness, drugs, public masturbation, and comedy (it's really good, check…

Mamma M’s Movie Club: Best Witch And Vampire Movies to Watch on Halloween

Like many of you, halloween is one of my favorite holidays (if not my absolute favorite). I have so many fun memories dressing up with my mom (she used to dress up as Dolly Parton or Elvira), seeing friends and overdosing on candy, then getting older and passing out candy, and that one time passing…

Keep Off The Grass: In Loving Memory of my Grandpa G

Note: I wrote this a few days ago. On my desk, I have a photograph of my grandfather when he was young and stationed in Japan. He’s in his marines uniform somewhere on the U.S. base crouching on a grassy area next to a sign that says “keep off the grass.” He is handsome and…

The Four Purple Horses of the Apocalypse

I don't need to tell any of you that 2020 can eat a giant bag of donkey dongs. It's been a pretty terrible year so far with the plague, earthquakes in Utah, the fires all over the west, schools being closed, loved ones getting sick, isolation, depression, anxiety, and as of last week hurricane winds…