36 Weeks Pregnant: Please Send This Child an Eviction Notice (and tell me I’m pretty)

Next week I'll be 37 weeks pregnant which means (according to Google and my lady doctor) that I'll be full-term. Please, someone, send this kid an eviction notice. He's taking up all of the space in my insides and I look like a candied apple, just a giant round thing on top of two sticks.…