chaos and curiosity
It's always hard to jump back into blogging after a busy spell because there's so much I want to write, I don't know where to start. So I'm just going to go for it and summarize all of the things in a sort of update style listicle of all the things that are making me…
Continue reading ➞ Asbestos, Tampons, and Intensity: A Mother’s Daily Journey
The other day a rare thing happened, and I got an hour to myself to hang out with one of my very good friends. We got coffee and chatted about his daughter getting married, my vampire novel in the works and how it might have an offensive amount of my real life in it, and the difficulty…
Continue reading ➞ Found This Terrifying Painting for my Guest Room.
This isn't a real post, more of a passing observation. I've noticed over the past year that I'm doing that thing that many first time parents do: Expecting way too much from my two year old. As the oldest of ninety-thousand kids, I absolutely hated this growing up. At five I was practically expected to…
Continue reading ➞ I’m Not Sorry My Toddler Acts Like a Toddler, Thank You Very Much
Eighties parents were like, "Okay kids, you're going to stay with this lady named, er, Barbara, I think? Anyhow, be back later. Don't be a cry baby, Jesus christ, she's not scary, some ladies just like to hold a flaming torch to match their HORNS FROM SATAN."
My two year old is intense. He's almost always smiling and happy and he shows happiness with cackling laughter, leaps, hops, cheerleader level clapping, and squeals of glee between shouts of "this is amazing!"
When I found out I was pregnant, I panicked and ran out to buy a billion books on parenting and pregnancy. I'm a reader. A nerd who researches everything. Mostly because I realized a long time ago that I mostly lack common sense and need ideas on how to function as a basic adult in…
Continue reading ➞ Jesus Christ, Nancy: Parenting and Trolls
I had to temporarily step away from blogging for a minute. Mainly because my toddler stopped napping for two weeks and has been secretly flushing toys down our toilet and the toilet exploded and rained crap water from the top floor and through a light fixture to the bottom floor. It was...so shitty (ha ha!).…
I was sitting in the living room today, listening to Dolly Parton's Christmas album (DOLLY PARTON FOREVER) when my son came running around the corner waving a paper punch in the air. He stopped dead in his tracks about two feet from me, looked into my face with wild eyes and said, "HOLE IN NOSE!", then launched himself at my head like a Facesucker alien trying to get the office tool around my nostril.
It’s one of those gray windy days. The leaves are falling and rustling as they make their way across our front yard and into the neighbor’s driveway. It’s the perfect weather for writing (or reading), cozied up with a sweater, a warm cup of something, and a comfortable chair. Or in my case, a floor-length…
A few years ago, I was stretched out on a lawn chair next to my sister’s pool when she plopped down next to me, yelled at her kids to stop getting water everywhere, and casually asked, “So are you guys going to have kids?” Already in my mid-thirties, I’d learned that this question was the…
Continue reading ➞ How Bartending Prepared Me For Motherhood
m.e. evans 