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About Me

Just a woman trying to navigate life in her 30's: An international marriage, a baby, a dickhead dog, a freelance writing career, anxiety, and a love for weird and majestic animals. I occasionally write about my childhood (my immaculate conception, my dad's unibrow, my mom's camel-toe 80's jeans) as memories are roused to life by my weekly therapy appointments. I have no idea what I'm doing.

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My Travel Blog

My Current Life In Italy

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RT @CJaneKendrick: Lord give me the confidence of a conservative religious female boomer on her way to make some judgements on facebook. 5 days ago
RT @OhNoSheTwitnt: The Meghan and Harry story is great because it’s like a reverse Aladdin where the prince marries a commoner who rescues… 5 days ago

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With spirit fingers.

Here are a few things I’ve noticed since having my son: •Parents are scary: I will die or kill for my kid. Without question. I had no idea that parents were so gangster. Turns out yes, yes they are. All moms are Al Pacino in yoga pants. Fucking terrifying. •Anxiety is so much worse and weird: I’m already an anxious person but it’s a lot worse with a kid. I spend a lot of time thinking like a CIA operative. Is this house safe? Exits? Potential threats? Hmm he seems weird, Siri scan the sex offender list for… •Zero tolerance: I had a low tolerance for shit before but now it is zero. No time for crap friends or bitchy family members. No time for Karen’s bullshit while standing in line for a coffee. Get your goddamn half caf, half decaf, half mocha, skinny latte and sit down Karen. No time. •Ambition for days: I’ve always been driven but ever since I pushed my little gremlin out into the world it’s so much more intense. There’s something about sleep deprivation that makes you feel like you can do anything. •World problems: I’ve always cared about the state of the world but since becoming a parent it’s much much more. His future, his life, depends on the choices we make right now as global citizens. Voting matters more. The environment matters more. Everything matters more. Now when you fuck up the planet you’re messing with my kid. See bullet number one. (Read the full post-Link in bio) #momlife #momsofinstagram #itsmonday #scarymommy #momlifebelike

Be the change you want to see in the world. Compliment people like you want to wear them.

It’s been one hell of a year, y’all. In 2019 I became a mom, published a book, spent some time on a beach in Italy, argued like crazy with my husband, and managed the entire year anxiety medication free (surprisingly). Although I’ve taken enough CBD to zen out an entire herd of elephants. This year has been full of sleepless nights, deep anxiety, confusion, ambition, strength, self doubt and chaos. Some moments are so beautiful I cry actual tears (all related to Leo because no matter how much I like my husband I’ve never felt elated when he stands up alone, although sometimes I do feel like I should clap when he manages to say words). Other times, I’m exhausted and the world is a really dull shade of what the fuck. This year has been full of gains and losses, I gained a mini but lost a little brain function because apparently giving birth gives you temporary brain damage (real thing). I gained one form of love but feel another one is slipping away. I’m more focused and ambitious than ever but unsure how to navigate the new conditions of the terrain. Basically, 2019 has been complicated like every other year but in different ways. Looking forward to an also complicated 2020 because that’s life. #nye2020 #nye

Be a doll and pass me a xanny, would you? #nye2020 #quotesdaily #anxietyquote

Im a day late (of course) but happy holidays, everyone! For the first time, Francesco and I celebrated Christmas alone on a little local mini vacation since it’s the only time he has off and we really needed some time to remember why we like each other (the majestic chest hair? Dashing good looks? Accent? The way he silently watches everyone in the house like the world is his own private movie theater). Leo had a really good time opening his little gifts and playing with his toys (except for that one my sister got him that made him yell at it for ten min and then inexplicably burst into tears?) and he can now add “very good at ripping paper” to his resume of “fond of vacuums and also toilets.” He’s gonna be the *best* janitor this side of the Rocky Mountains. On another note: I totally bombed the many parts of the holidays that matter to me. We didn’t gather up Oliver’s old toys to donate to the humane society (yet). We didn’t donate to a favorite charity (yet). And we didn’t spend winter solstice reading and snacking. These are things that I really want Leo to grow up with because I don’t want the holidays to be about stuff. Rather, I want them to be about love and family and giving back and yeah, some gifts because im not a total fun hater like my husband @frafunhater I hope that all of you had a lovely holiday (solstice, Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa) where you feel loved and safe. #christmas2019 #holidays2019 #happyholidays2019 #kwanzaa #wintersolstice

You Might Be Interested In: M. E. Evans

My First Year of Momhood: Moms are Like Al Pacino in Yoga Pants

What to do When Love Cannot Conquer All

I am Very Important Now: Instagram Updates and a Sizzle of Firefighters

Book Launch! M.E. Evans: Naked (in Italy): A Memoir About the Pitfalls of La Dolce Vita

I’m Probably Making A Huge Mistake

Dante

S’io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s’i’odo il vero,
Senza tema d’infamia ti rispondo.

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