Just Stare Into My Vagina And Tell Me It Will Be Okay

My husband and I are in our mid-thirties and approaching that romantic place where we feel like if we're going to have babies we should probably do it. I've held out for a long time. Partially to spite our family because his parents are like, "do you not understand how sex works?" and my dad…

My Dog Hates Me

I really like my dog, Oliver, a lot. In a sort of stalkerish, I watch him while he sleeps, sort of way. The love is not mutual, though. In fact, I'm preeeetty sure he hates me. I used to tell myself that he's just bored with me. I've worked at home for most of his life so…

Does This Cup Make My Vagina Look Huge?

My friend K just moved back from France. So, it made sense for us to catch up over a FOUR HOUR phone call (it actually flew by). During this conversation, we talked about work. K is a former journalist turned evil copywriter, like me. Only, replace "journalist" with "literature major," and "pimp." We talked about the…

Going To The OBGYN Is A Lot Like Trying On Shoes Only Not At All

I sat in the pink gown with the scratchy paper draped over my lap waiting for the doctor to come in to give me my yearly checkup. My husband, Francesco sat awkwardly in the corner repeating, "200 dollars?" He was shell shocked that we had forgotten our insurance cards and were forced to pay for…

Dog Park People And Observations: Our Savior The Dog And Aquanet Addiction

I've spent a lot of time at dog parks. Back in college I fostered dogs for a group that took adoptable dogs from high-kill shelters. Often, my fosters were labs or pitbulls, breeds that require a lot of exercise to be happy and healthy. Dog parks are a great place to socialize dogs while they…